If you receive a wedding invite with your children's names not on it .....?

...... would you assume they are not invited.





The wedding is not too close to us, maybe an hour, and at 2 oclock. There is no way I am leaving my 1 year old and 3 and half year old with someone all day.





So looks like my husband will go on his own.





So would you assume they are not invited and would your partner go with out you, and if they did would you mind





It is his friend and I think he should go

If you receive a wedding invite with your children's names not on it .....?
If they are not on the envelope they are not invited. IGNORE anyone who said just bring them that is the height of rudness. Bringing anyone who is not specifically invited is rude. IGNORE anyone who says ask them. You put that person in a terrible position, where they have to repeat for you what the envelope tells you, they are not invited. I am having a child friendly wedding, but not everyone goes that way and you have to respect that. Imagine if you were fulltime care taker for your invailid parents and the two of you were invited to a wedding, hmmm lets just bring mom and dad along, they wont mind...it would be just as ridiculous to make that assumption.
Reply:personally i would not have wanted to bring my 1 %26amp; 3 yr old to a wedding no matter what the bride and groom said. it would be out of respect for them and sanity for myself.





alot depends on the time of day, the type of wedding and the bride and grooms wishes. call them and ask but make it clear your feelings will not get hurt if they want to reserve the wedding and reception for adults and older kids.


plus it wouldn't hurt your kids to be without you for a few hours and it would be good for you and your husband.
Reply:well i assume the people know you so just ASK THEM they'll say yes because they don't want to be rude but if you don't want you kids to come along keep that mouth shut and leave them behind.
Reply:hi... if my sons name wasn't on the invite.. i wouldn't go.
Reply:Yes, that means they are not invited, if their names were not specifically on the invitation. According to Emily Post's Wedding Etiquette, a bride-to-be should only put the names of the people she wishes to invite on the invitation envelope. So yes, it looks like you'll be staying home with the kiddies, as long as your husband's comfortable with the idea of going to the wedding alone. I personally wouldn't mind if my husband went to a wedding alone, as long as I had been invited but couldn't go because of a good reason like kids. Have a good day.
Reply:I made the mistake and forgot to add the words "and guest" or add their kids names so people are asuming this about my wedding. So I have emailed my guests and let them know they can bring anyone, any age.


Maybe this is just a misunderstanding.


See if he can ask his friend.
Reply:I wouldn't take the rugrats with you when you go (Rugrats not used as a mean term here!)





But you might want to double check just to be sure. My family recently recieved a wedding invitation (the wedding is today actually) and my name wasn't on it. My dad checked with the groom to be and he said that they had just forgotten to put my name on the invitation!
Reply:Never assume anything. call and ask diplomatically.
Reply:DONT make him beg, they are NOT invited!!





Let him go alone if you don't


want to pay a babysitter!
Reply:My wife and I were invited to a family wedding - with a "polite" notice requesting No Children!


My children are very much part of our family, and correct me if I wrong, but are they not a major product of the days ahead after most marriages?!!!!


We took the stance that if my children were not welcome, then we would effectively boycott the wedding. So we didn't go.


The happy couple now have their own children - now I wonder how they would feel if they were excluded from family gatherings?





As to would we assume that our children were not included if they were not mentioned on the invite. I would make the assumption that yes they were. Family is family, and those of us with children will appreciate the importance of them.


Take the children. If they are turned away, offer to get the groom a DIY vasectomy kit!
Reply:I'd ask the bride and groom...





It would be a shame for you to miss out...





But thats very generous of you to let your partner go on his own... not sure if i would be that generous!
Reply:I would call and ask the bride first especially if it is a wedding you would like to attend. Maybe someone else helped with the invites and didnt add children's names.
Reply:Nope, they're not invited. It's a shame you don't have a trusted family member who can watch the kids for you. I'm sure, as a mother, you could use the adult conversations.
Reply:Good assumption...sounds like a kid-free wedding. My partner wouldn't go, but that's only because its like pulling teeth sometimes to get him to do stuff like that. Otherwise, I would want him to go, and I wouldn't mind. Our wedding is kid-free because we chose to have it at a modern art gallery, not exactly a kid-friendly place.
Reply:First of all, a wedding is NO place for children under 8, unless they are part of the wedding party. Um. Have you never heard of a babysitter? Kids can cope with being without their parents for 5 hours. And, an hour is close. Have you never had a night without your kids? Maybe it's time. Why don't you BOTH go.
Reply:You are 100% correct in thinking that if a person's name isn't on the invitation then that person isn't invited. I urge you to get over your "seperation anxiety" and learn to leave your children with a reputable caregiver for a day now and then. You are a mother, but you are also a wife and should have "just us" time with your husband, should be at his side for important social events. How would YOU like it if he told you to manage your social life on your own because he was too involved with the children to bother?





There are plenty of "husband poachers" out there ready to persuade him that all YOU care about is the kids and hubby is nothing but a bill payer. Be there looking good so he can show you off instead of pretending not to hear snide remarks about his wife taking him for granted.
Reply:Yes - I would assume that they are not invited. If you can't make it then your husband should go alone.
Reply:An invite is specific to those to whom it is addressed. So I am afraid your children are not invited.
Reply:When I wrote my invitations I didn't write the names of my little cousins on the invitation and my aunt and uncle were afraid they weren't invited but that wasn't the case at all! I didn't think about it until they asked but of course the kids can come. I wasn't offended by the question at all and am happy they can all come. Why not call up the bride and ask? Just say that you are trying to make arrangements for travel and need to know if the kids are really invited or not since you're unsure. Apparently I didn't follow etiquette by not writing the names of my cousins, but it's turned out fine because they know they're invited. Just ask. Usually when I get an invitation for an adult only wedding it says something like that on the invitation and not necessarily in how it's addressed.
Reply:If your invite does not list the children or say "Mr. and Mrs. ... and family"... do not bring your children. I know a lot of people who have "adult only" weddings... they most likely did not budget to feed the children and the only other children will probably be the ones in the wedding party. I know a lot of people do not include the children because they want the adults to be able to relax and enjoy the evening... and if you're chasing little ones all day/evening it's hard to get out on the dance floor and cut loose.





If you are opposed to leaving your children with a sitter for the day, your husband should probably still make an appearance... especially if it's a good friend.
Reply:As the children are so young, yes i'd assume they weren't invited.





They probably don't want children there due to possible crying
Reply:It sounds to me that since the kids weren't included on the invite, that they are not invited. It could also mean that the bride and groom forgot to include the kids. I would call and double check before you assume that the children aren't invited.
Reply:I would assume that they aren't invited. No I wouldn't mind my partner going on his own if it's one of his mates. I would make an effort if it was some one I know well (Friends of both of you) and perhaps not stay too late.
Reply:As you have such a problem with childcare, what would happen if you had to suddenly be rushed to hospital? You should try to find someone who you would trust to look after your children at times like these. It is beneficial to children to have another familiar adult for times of emergency. You cannot let your children rule your life to this extent. Are you in the States? In the UK, we have Council Registered childminders for people without other options in childcare. Mine went to one, as I went back to work when she was 8 weeks old.


The children are not named on invitation, and are not therefore invited. This happened several times to us, and will happen to you again. Although I would have preferred to take her, I understood the reasons she wasn't included, and didn't boycott the event in protest.
Reply:Personally if i could leave my 3 kids with someone they knew and i trusted then i would go too. I went to a good friends wedding when my kids were 6, 2 and 1 and my mum looked after them...why miss out on the lovely day? My husband and i relish the time' away' from the kids even if its only a couple of times a year!
Reply:I'm sorry, but I don't believe that there's NOBODY you could ask to mind your kids for a few hours..... If you tried, I'm sure someone out there is a respectable and responsible human being who would be more than willing to help you out for the day.





I wouldn't bring the kids and I wouldn't ask... As a few other people here have said, why don't you just go along together and have fun for the day - as a couple, without the kids...
Reply:Well dear its the tax of having kids.


You cant take them to all the places you go to "thats why you are a mother" to sacrifice some joy for their own sake.


No you cant take them with you, its not appropriate. I know its not fun to stay at home while there is an event out of there but hey if you have any family members around you (mother, sister, brother, or anyone at all) why dont you ask them to put them for you as a favor?
Reply:Yes, it means they are not invited.





I don't have kids yet so I can't really put myself in your situation. I don't know if my fiance would go without me but if I felt how you did, I probably wouldn't mind.
Reply:Looks like you'll both have to sit this one out. Children are more important than any friend.
Reply:id take the kids anyways. they r a part of u guys. its like a package
Reply:The sender is an ignorant pig, ignore it.